The Asshole Trap

Okay, okay, even though I've been in the Asshole Trap a time or two (largely of my own making), this song is generically dedicated to maledom's failure to understand the wiley nuances of the more complicated gender. Though never intended to inpugn one sex over the other, I suppose the solo (and I shan't reveal the method for producing that sound that would cause a banshee to run in horror) does unintentionally tip the scales toward misogyny. This features John on frantic drums, Olly on oh-so-tight-oh-so-right bass. I get to play some of my metallest guitar, sing vocals, play keyboards and coax the caterwalling solos from the depths of hell itself. Sorry, Ladies. Fellas, I feel ya'.




She got me in the Asshole Trap
I'm sinking deeper in this crap
It's like I'm knee deep in quicksand
You'd think by now I'd understand

Dug a hole, covered it up
with lots of leaves and twigs
and little things, like
seemingly harmless questions

Made a snare, put in the bait
A little honey and some sugar
so my reflexes were late

Might as well get comfy
and settle down with a box of wine
It's pretty obvious
You'd think I'd know the warning signs

Wore a wire, wrote down what I said
including things I had to wonder
how they leaked out of my head

Got advice from one of her friends
To corroborate her story
and I surrender in the end

I apologize in advance for anything I say or do
to lead you to believe the things you think I'm thinking about you
And I relinquish my verbal sheild
All arguments I hereby yield
for that which I would offer merely illustrates your position